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About Literature / Hobbyist RackenhammerMale/United States Recent Activity
Deviant for 6 Years
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The Flight Over (Gift)
“Hunny, do you have any more zinc drops?”
The Lopunny addressed emitted that curious combination of sigh and laugh that one reserves for the quirks of one’s spouse.  “Don’t you think you’ve stocked up enough?  They could stock a pharmacy with all the vitamins you’ve taken!”
The male stuck to his guns.  “It’s the air in this cabin.  Pressurized, dry, recycled.  If you don’t keep your immune system in tip-top shape, you’ll catch something nasty.”  It was perhaps only natural to expect a well-built pokemon like himself to be a bit of a health nut, even more so when one considers his medical training.  Hunny did consider this, and handed the other lopunny the drops requested.  “Thanks.  Make sure that little Two-Tone took his, too.  I definitely don’t want him to get sick right before we land in Alola.”
“Oh, don’t worry Courtne
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Tradition, Tradition! (Part 6)
“So, when are we going to meet your parents?  I must confess some curiosity to your immediate antecedents.”  Whether it was the conviviality of the brunch, or just the champagne loosening her tongue, Zephyre’s mother Rashida seemed to be warming up to the idea of Conrad marrying her daughter.  
For himself, Conrad was pleased and relieved, the impossible task of pleasing his in-laws had just become that much smaller.  “They should be here any minute, but they did instruct us not to wait on eating for them.”  He took a sip of his coffee, slightly regretting his choice of words.  The vampires present couldn’t ‘eat’ technically, not without potentially disastrous consequences.
So far, the meal was progressing without disaster, and the bride and groom tried to shake the foreboding from them and enjoy the company of their respective families.  Zephyre’s uncle Giacomo and his family had attempted to stay
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Tradition, Tradition! (Part 5)
The worst part of it all was that Conrad could see the inevitable disaster coming.  The very first problem had to do with the catering.  Conrad’s family could eat mortal food, and most were amateur enthusiasts of cookery.  Zephyre’s family, being technically dead, couldn’t, and not many restaurants served blood or raw meat.  Vampires could drink, though, which meant that extra champagne for the mimosas was added to the bill.
*Fantastic; and since they can’t eat anything, nothing will dilute the alcohol. Drunk, vampiric in-laws, that’s wonderful.*    While Conrad kept a lid on his thoughts, Zephyre could definitely pick up on his apprehension, which did not help with her own.  The breakfast was being served in a Domish Bistro reserved for the purpose, a full table d’hote affair.  How on earth were the serving staff not going to notice that the Bride and her family were taking no food?  Questio
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Tradition, Tradition! (Part 4)
As Conrad and Zephyre waited at the station for the first of the arrivals of her in-laws, he couldn’t help but wonder how much of the anxiety he saw on her face was residual from the arrival of her family, or apprehension over his.  He reached over to pull her close, in an attempt to reassure her.  “Relax, my folks are all cool about this.  They’ll love you, and I think you’ll like them too.”
The vampires did manage a smile at that, “And here I thought that a clan of half-vampire vampire hunters might possibly have a problem with me marrying in.”
The hybrid chuckled.  “Nah, you’re thinking of the Motnblancs, Vaughan’s people.  Mine are the Judays, we just wanted to fit in and stay out of trouble.  After all, there really isn’t a difference, when one’s a half-vampire, between marrying a full mortal or a full vampire, now, is there?”
That got a laugh out of her, and he was p
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Tradition, Tradition! (Part 3)
“Do they know we’re out here?”  Morrissey’s voice wavered slightly as he set up the monitoring equipment on the car dashboard.  This was the first time he’d ever been on-site during a surveillance mission; his role was usually providing support from home.
“Oh, I’m pretty sure they can guess that I wouldn’t give them so many injunctions if I wasn’t prepared to enforce them.”  Vaughan carefully adjusted the viewfinder so as to see through the windows of the hotel rooms where Zephyre’s family had been booked.  This was routine to him, and his tone was as calm as an old police sergeant.
“Are… we going to get in trouble for this?”  The lynx was looking at the monitor with a worried look.
“If they rat us out to the authorities, there’s no incentive for us to keep our mouths shut, so I don’t think-“
“Not from the police, from them.  They
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Tradition, Tradition! (Part 2)
Conrad hadn’t expected to be welcomed with open arms, exactly.  It was going to take an extension of his charm to the fullest extent to win them over.  
So far, his progress was not encouraging.
“I suppose,” Zephyre’s Aunt Lunara sniffed, “That I can hardly say you’re to be blamed in this matter.  It is rare that such advantageous opportunities fall to one of your sort.”
Conrad took the dig in stride.  “Once in a lifetime, I should say.”  And he leaned in to nuzzle his fiancée on the car seat next to him, which soothed her feelings a little.
Severa was bitterer; one expected her to spit vinegar with every word.  “Hmph, he’s a fool if he thinks to profit from the match.  You’re both no better than peasants now.”
Rashida was quick to retort, “Whatever our state may be, my daughter is still a princess, whether or not everyone else is too dull to see it!
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Tradition, Tradition! (Part 1)
*I can’t wait until Zephyre and I are married; then we won’t have to plan a wedding anymore.*  Conrad thought, as another interminable dispute dragged on over the procedures.  Of course, he had it lucky, and he knew it.   Zephyre was giving him no pressure to stage anything elaborate, since she knew from personal and painful experience that lavish ceremonies meant literally nothing in the long run. Really, the biggest logistical issue was just setting a date so all of Conrad’s extended family (and being part rabbit, he had a lot of them) could attend.
So far, so good.  But the problem came in with the fact that, as Zephyre had come from an isolated settlement of vampires, as more or less a refugee, she had no guests, and therefore no one to give her away, and no one for Matron of honor and bridesmaids.  Or rather, the problem wasn’t so much their absence, as it was certain well-intentioned but misguided attempts to fill them.
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A cobbled street in Belgrade by Rackenhammer A cobbled street in Belgrade :iconrackenhammer:Rackenhammer 0 0
My Faith and Little Ponies
I’ve given a lot of thought these past few seasons on what it was exactly that made me like My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic so much.  It is a well-made animated show, but it’s not alone in this respect.  Yet, of all the gems of children’s entertainment, nothing resonated so much with as this one little show about colorful equines.  And now, I think I know why.
The conclusion I’ve come to is this: that it, in many ways, mirrors my own Faith and worldview.  If I had to explain how my belief in Christ affected my view of the world, I could use MLP:FiM as an effective object lesson.
The central concept of the show is Friendship, that is, of making and cultivating a meaningful relationship with someone else.  That idea of a relationship is also central to the Universe, and of God Himself.  He, being three Persons in One God, knew that Love, that comradeship, which was central to all true joy, and wished to make beings that he could s
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MLP OC: Sky Sailing by Rackenhammer MLP OC: Sky Sailing :iconrackenhammer:Rackenhammer 1 0
The Cricketers in the Rye: Chapter 2
        Everypony has a special talent; all they have to do is discover it.  That was one of the fundamental principles of life in Equestria, as unquestioned as the daily sunrise, the value of friends, or the rule of the Princesses.
        The hidden shadow had, at various times, doubted them all.  Also, the sanctity of love, the value of politeness, and the point of existence itself had all been questioned in turn.  What remained was only one certainty, one philosophical peg upon which all the world hung and what kept it from dissolving away on the very worst days: the deliciousness of strawberry milkshakes.  And, if there had been any available for it to snatch up from the back alley of Sugar Cube Corner, the next few months might have turned out quite differently.
        However, Pinkie Pie, having already gotten her strawberry fix for the day by licking off Twilight’s smoothie off her face, deci
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The Cricketers in the Rye: Chapter 1
By the time 2 o'clock had rolled around without crisis following upon its heels, Twilight Sparkle felt that maybe, just maybe, the rest of the day might go according to schedule as well.  She held her breath for second after thinking so, as if the very thought might bring disaster crashing down around her mane.  Two seconds later, she was shaking her head, chiding herself, "Really Twilight, you have got to stop being so superstitious!"
As cheerily as she resumed her afternoon routine, she couldn't deny that if she had been superstitious, Ponyville would have given her plenty to be superstitious about.  It seemed that something was always on the verge of happening at some conveniently dramatic moment, which would invariably escalate into some huge brouhaha that would set the town on edge for a week, before dying down into a deceptive small-town bucolic peace.  *How in Equestria did small towns get a reputation for being dull?  Most of what I've read suggested
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The Cricketers in the Rye: Prologue
        Until it opened its collective morning paper on that bright, early summer day, the sporting world of Canterlot was not to know what hit it.  Set in boldface type, above even the perennially popular racing reports, was the sensational account of the greatest scandal to hit the cricket world since the Trottingham club spiked the ginger-beer of the Equestrian National team's lunch on the last day of a hotly-contested set; first noticed when the star batsman attempted to hit at the bowler's volley with a wooden spoon.
        It was nothing short of the discovery that the two premier upper-class Universities, Clopsford and Canterbridge, had secretly arranged to fix their rivalry match at the behest of ponies unknown, speculation centering around a high-stakes betting ring.  The editorials were full of shocked statements written in the stuffiest language possible, all about the "death of sportsponyship" and "the fall of the game into the hooves of the moneygrubbing classes."
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Might Batsman (OC Pony) *Full Profile* by Rackenhammer Might Batsman (OC Pony) *Full Profile* :iconrackenhammer:Rackenhammer 2 0
Picnics, as a rule, should never be planned events.  You should wake up in the morning, discovering that it is a fine day outside.  Sauntering over to the kitchen, you muse upon the fact that, after all, life is too short to spend so much time under planks and shingles, eating your meals of the desiccated corpse of a tree.  Then, you pack your basket, set off for a favored spot, and take your feast al fresco.
So, at any rate, was Conrad's explanation for why he and Zephyre were disembarking about 20 miles from the city limits, at a lakeside park right about where a forest faded into scrub and meadow.  Not that she minded much.
"Aw, thanks Conrad.  I really did need to go hunting pretty soon."  She grinned back at him, her three tails twitching in excitement.  A stray bit of the sun glinted off her elongated fangs, in a way quite literally dazzling, as far as Conrad was concerned.
"You're welcome!  I'
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Wordsworth Psmith (Pony OC) *Full Profile* by Rackenhammer Wordsworth Psmith (Pony OC) *Full Profile* :iconrackenhammer:Rackenhammer 3 0

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“Hunny, do you have any more zinc drops?”

The Lopunny addressed emitted that curious combination of sigh and laugh that one reserves for the quirks of one’s spouse.  “Don’t you think you’ve stocked up enough?  They could stock a pharmacy with all the vitamins you’ve taken!”

The male stuck to his guns.  “It’s the air in this cabin.  Pressurized, dry, recycled.  If you don’t keep your immune system in tip-top shape, you’ll catch something nasty.”  It was perhaps only natural to expect a well-built pokemon like himself to be a bit of a health nut, even more so when one considers his medical training.  Hunny did consider this, and handed the other lopunny the drops requested.  “Thanks.  Make sure that little Two-Tone took his, too.  I definitely don’t want him to get sick right before we land in Alola.”

“Oh, don’t worry Courtney, he’s taken everything he needs.  Right, son?”  She smiled down at the little Buneary, who was staring out the window as the plane soared over the earth below.

“Yes, Momma.  Auntie Orchid made sure of it.”  He sounded… less than enthusiastic.  Hunny sighed; she had been so hoping that her boy would be excited by this trip by their Master to Alola, he was bringing the whole family on tour!  And, of course, looking to add another region’s league title to his list.  Given that his family consisted of the very pokemon who had helped him gather that list in the first place, most commentators were predicting a clean sweep for Richard Willard.

Not that Two-tone himself was likely to compete, of course.  It was pretty likely that someone else might get subbed out, too, if Richard found another local to adopt into the family.  It was the custom that the locals got their chance to win at their home region, and the rest of the team would be structured around to cover their weaknesses and bolster their strengths.  Except for Tenka, that Charizard had been with Richard from the beginning, and was in fact with him now, several rows up.

Mentally cursing the 14-hour flight-time, Hunny sighed and leaned the chair back as far as it would go.  Turns out, that was about 2 inches.  She sighed again.  Like most pokemon on the competitive circuit, she lived an active lifestyle, and thus sitting still for so long was anathema to her.  It didn’t help that the seats were so cramped, but Richard hardly had enough to fly everyone over first class, and he wasn’t about to play favorites among his family.  Which meant that everyone had to suffer equally.

It only took Two-Tone an hour to get bored and fall asleep.  Hunny and Courtney were not long in following him.  Red-eye flights may get a bad name, but there was something to be said for actually being awake, bright-eyed and bushy tailed upon arrival.  Of course, said arrival would be at 3-o’clock in the morning, but that was time zones for you….

*Ding!*  “This is your captain speaking, and on behalf of the Alolan region, Aloha e komo mai!  We’ll be touching down soon on the beautiful island…*

Hunny blinked, suddenly sitting up.  She still couldn’t see, which panicked her at first until she reached up to feel the sleeping mask on her face.  She tore it off, giving a most unamused glance at Courtney, who was smiling at her.  “Stewardess woke me up to offer them.” The irony of that statement was acknowledged with a derisive snort.  “I didn’t want her to come and do the same to you.”

“Hm.  Well, it did help me sleep, so thank you.”  She looked over to her son, stirring him gently.  “Two-tone, wake up.  We’re almost there!”

“Hm, wha…?”  The little buneary rubbed his eyes, looking up at his mother, and then out the window.  In the night scene could be seen the island, lit up by the lights from the city on the shore.  Immediately, Two-tone’s eyes grew wide.  “Momma, they’ve got buildings!  They’ve got a city!”  He was wide-awake now, and chattering excitedly, somewhat to the amusement of the passengers within earshot.

“Yes, yes they do.”  Hunny was happy to see her child back to his energetic self, but was slightly puzzled by his reaction.  She would hardly have thought that mere buildings were the most exciting thing about this new region.  

“I thought we were all gonna have to live in grass huts!”

Now comprehension began to dawn.  Hunny could hear Courtney behind her start to laugh.  “Why would you think that?”

“Auntie Orchid said-”

“I said,” Interjected the lucario one row up, turning back to face the buneary, “That I would love to go to Alola even if I had to live in a grass hut!  That doesn’t mean we’ll have to; Richard can afford nicer places.”  Hunny’s large ears were keen enough to pick up Orchid’s grumbled, “Cheap flights notwithstanding…”

Now, pretty much everyone was laughing, a welcome distraction from the business of landing a large plane at a small airport.  Islands were stingy with their real estate.  Soon, the business was done, leaving the passengers to gather their things and disembark on their new adventure!  *We’re off to a great start, at least!*  Hunny smiled to herself, giving a quick hug to her son before leading him off the plane to join the others.
The Flight Over (Gift)
Hey, look!  It's my first actual submission in literally years!

This one's a short story for :iconthegrumpiestpanda:.  His Birthday's coming up, so I thought I'd do something nice for him.  I can't draw fan-art, but I can write, so I thought I'd do a cute little vignette starring some of his anthro pokemon OC's.

I'm actually slightly nervous; writing other people's characters can be tricky, as I don't know them nearly so well as their creators.  I hope I didn't mess this one up, and that you like it!

Pokemon (c) GameFreak and Nintendo
Richard Willis & co. (c) :iconthegrumpiestpanda:



Artist | Hobbyist | Literature
United States
Current Residence: Fairfax, VA
deviantWEAR sizing preference: M
Favourite genre of music: Eh, I'm eclectic
Operating System: Mac OSX
MP3 player of choice: iPod
Wallpaper of choice: MLP: FiM
Favourite cartoon character: Twilight Sparkle
Personal Quote: Be Humble in Yourself, but Adamant in the Truth
  • Listening to: O Come Emmanuel
  • Reading: Father Brown Mysteries
  • Watching: Christmas Specials
  • Playing: Pokemon White
  • Drinking: Tea
And God bless you all!


Add a Comment:
Athos01 Featured By Owner Apr 8, 2016
Thank you very much for faving :).
Vertical-Misfit Featured By Owner Aug 22, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
:highfive: thanks for the watch :D
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Wooxx Featured By Owner Jan 16, 2014  Student Digital Artist
Thanks for watching me! :)
MysteryFanBoy718 Featured By Owner Nov 17, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Thank you very much for the watch.
KSapphire8989 Featured By Owner Oct 10, 2013  Professional Traditional Artist
RadioactiveKittenLuv Featured By Owner Sep 22, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Thank you for the membership!
Rackenhammer Featured By Owner Sep 22, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
You're welcome!
RadioactiveKittenLuv Featured By Owner Jul 27, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Happy Birthday Bro!
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